Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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