White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
