every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i wish my penis had a tongue
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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