Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
