Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
