i would punch a child for taco bell
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
