did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
