I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize