You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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