You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I just want to make out with him forever
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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