what day is it and did you see me today?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
