Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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