i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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