So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
3pm strippers are depressing
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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