Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize