i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
