I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
