I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
