ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
operation have a gay friend backfired
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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