grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
