vagina is talking i cant
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
