Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
