Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize