While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
