I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
