I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
please don't ironically join a cult
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