Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I need a burrito and a hug.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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