Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
