my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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