Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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