Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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