I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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