then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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