i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
