i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
