Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize
