Hey man sorry I got all grabby
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
