just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
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