Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
