If i come over, it means nothing
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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