Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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