So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Randomize