so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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