He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
