Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize