It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
