Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
that is very illegal...i love you.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize