question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
