You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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