apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
