He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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