Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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